Tag Archives: Gwen Stefani

I have a cold, so I stayed home and stuck wads of toilet paper up my nose while Aaron went out into the world, played hockey, saw other people and acted like a functional human being. About an hour into my quarantine, I started to get really bored. I turned to social media for amusement, and then I made some dumb jokes in an effort to get people to pay attention to my sad, sickly ass.

First, I compared Lana Del Rey and her unique(?) stage presence to SCTV’s Perry Como skit. It’s uncanny!

Then I came up with the following equation to explain Madonna’s new video:

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